Journey's End

Thank you for following us on this long, tender journey. Surrounded by love and prayers, Linda ended her battle with cancer at 4:15 AM this morning. She was courageous, generous, and beautiful until the end. We thank you all so much for your support of her and of us throughout the past year and a half, for your prayers, and hugs. Words cannot express how much she will be missed, but she made the world a better place and we will take comfort in knowing that she made all of us better, too. We also take comfort knowing that she has gone to her richly deserved reward and is once again the life of the party.

In spite of all the pain we feel immensely grateful to be able to share in all the deep friendships that Linda spent her life nurturing between all of us. Because of this it's clear to us that we are the lucky ones in this struggle, and though it's hard to take consolation in that thought right now, we have faith that together with you we can look forward to a time not too far out when our wounds begin to heal and her memory will be a great strength and source of warmth in our lives.

We'll post again later with some more information and details of the arrangements, as well as other remembrances of Linda's life. In the meantime we love you all.

Andrea, Tony and Jim

Hospice

Jim again. Linda's condition continued to deteriorate over the weekend. By Monday, she was becoming less responsive and a bit disoriented. She has not left the bedroom since Friday, and only gets out of bed to use the bathroom. There was no way we would be able to get her to the doctor's office for her shot tomorrow, and according to the doctor, the injection was likely to cause fever and chills and other flu-like symptoms as well. I didn't want her to be any more uncomfortable that she already was, so after speaking with her doctor yesterday, I made the difficult decision to discontinue treatment and call Hospice. He felt that her condition is being caused by disease progression and was irreversible at this point.
Linda is not in any pain, not taking any pain medication, seems to sleep comfortably at night and rests comfortably but fitfully during the day. There is an army of neighbors standing by for anything she or I need. Tony arrived last night, and Andrea, Chris and Eli are expected any minute. So please don't worry, we are doing as well as can be expected for now.
In fact, Andrea and the gang just got in, so I have to go. Linda most likely won't be writing the posts from here on out, but I read all the comments to her as they arrive, and she receives strength and comfort from each and every message. We'll keep you posted, as they say.
Luv ya,
Jim

More bad news

I'm sorry to have to share this news with everyone, but things have not gone well since the last post. Linda is sleeping much, much more than usual and has had to start using pain medication on a regular basis. We saw the doctor on Friday and he told us that the most recent CT scan from 14 Nov showed the cancer was spreading again. Apparently the scan that was done on Oct 28th didn't show the new sites because it was done without contrast. He said it was clear that the Nexavar had stopped working.
His only recommendation was to try yet another drug (Avastin) that is used for other types of cancer but has had some success in clinical trials. There are more IVs involved, as well as other injections, so it will take some time for it to work, if it works at all. And time is not something that Linda has right now. Linda has bounced backed before after the other medications have stopped working, but she has never been this sick. She has trouble getting out of bed now, and getting to the doctor's has been even more difficult and painful for her. We will continue to hope, but we also know that we have to be realistic.
The kids will be here for Thanksgiving, and we are looking forward to spending the weekend together. We'll just have to wait and see what happens after that.
Luv ya,
Jim

Technical Problems

Apparently, some people have not been getting their email notifications of the new postings. If you never got one before, that's because I didn't have your email address. (Don't post it in the comments!) If you used to get them, it appears some people stopped getting them around October 3rd. Hopefully the problem is fixed now. Check the blog directly if you want to see the posts you might have missed. www.advantagelinda.blogspot.com

Jim

Not a Good Week

I swear, it seems as if the minute I mention good news on this blog, things go to hell in a hand cart. After last Monday's post when everything looked stable, Linda started getting abdominal pains that night. She didn't get much rest, so we graduated from Tylenol to some more heavy duty pain medication, which let her sleep most of the day.

Wednesday, things seem to be back to normal, but then Wednesday night the pains returned and got really, really bad. I spoke to the doctor Thursday morning and he recommended a higher pain medication dose that made it tolerable, and we went to see him Friday afternoon. Needless to say, traveling to the doctor's office was no fun for Linda. After getting a Demerol IV in his office, he sent us down to the emergency room at Christ hospital for yet another CT scan, as he was concerned that there were some liver problems, based on the location of the pain.

So our trip to the doctor ended up being another long day, as we didn't get home until 8:30 Friday evening. The good news is that they didn't find anything to explain the pain, but then that's the bad news too. Except for the trip to the doctor/ER, Linda had been in bed since Wednesday night. But by Saturday night the pain was gone again, and Linda was insistent on going to her cousin's fundraiser. As some of you may know, Connie Naber helped build a hospice and orphanage for HIV positive children in Tanzania (www.karamaconnection.org), and Linda had been planning on making one of the trips to Africa with Connie, when we found out her cancer had returned. (If you happen to be looking for a worthwhile charity to contribute to, this is a good one.)

So come hell or high water, we were going out Saturday night! As it turned out, it was a great opportunity for us to see all the Naber clan, and we had a great time. As of this Monday morning, Linda's abdominal pain is still there but minimal, and she's had to rest more than usual to recover from the weekend's events. That's all for now.

Thanks for all your concern and support,
Jim

A Quick Update

Lots to tell, just no time to tell it! So I'll have to make this quick.
For those of you keeping score at home, The CT scan results are in, and after some initial confusion at Christ Hospital, the radiologist's conclusion is that there has been no significant changes in the tumors since the August 5th scan. This is really the best that we could have hoped for. It means that Linda has been "progression free" for almost 3 months. Bhandari said he continues to be surprised, as Linda is the only patient in his experience for whom Nexavar has been effective after "progressing" on Sutent.
Unfortunately, there have been some downsides as well. Linda needed a blood transfusion again last Thursday, making it twice in the last three weeks. Foot sores have been very painful, and Linda has been suffering through a severe bout of chronic fatigue. So right now, we're trying to make the best of it, and looking forward to Thanksgiving with the kids.
I'll try to fill in the rest of the details later when I have more time.
TTFN,
Jim

You mean the Bengals actually won a game?

Yes that's right Elliot,for the first time in your life, the Bengals actually won! And you know what? Before you're old and gray, they might even win another one if your lucky! Ok, maybe that's not what he was smiling about. Maybe he was just happy to see his Grandma again. Linda was feeling well enough to travel, so we got down to Wilmington this past weekend. It's not as easy anymore for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is the fact that they eliminated the direct flight, so it's now an 8 hour trip door to door. We also had power problems at the townhome for the second trip in a row, which meant we didn't get to sleep until 2:30 in the morning. The main purpose of the trip was to spend Elliot's first Halloween together. His costume was getting early rave reviews, so we wanted to see it in person. And we weren't disappointed-- he pegged the cuteness meter again.

So it didn't matter much that Elliot had no idea what was going on-- he was warm and comfortable, his parents and grandparents had a great time showing him around the neighborhood and eating the four pieces of candy he collected in his mini-bucket.

The trip back was a marathon as well, since we were delayed out of Wilmington and missed our connection in Atlanta. (Like that's never happened to anyone before.) But we made it back late Monday, in time to vote today and make it to the blood test tomorrow. We will see Bhandari on Friday for the first time in a month. Btw, he had some very sad news of his own. While he was in India visiting with his parents, his father passed away unexpectedly. We talked with the nurses at the Bethesda ATC, and we're still trying to decide the best way to express our condolences and at the same time honor his father. Any suggestions?

Also we are anxious to get the results of the CT scan from last Tuesday. We will certainly hear no later than this Friday, and we'll let you know what we find out.

That's all for now.

Luv ya,

Linda and Jim